Monday, September 18, 2006 ;
9/18/2006 05:32:00 PM
hey peeps.
didnt go to school today. for a really crappy reason hahaha. anyways i wont put it here haha. anyhows. slept till 1 and den came down had lunch den slacked all the way till now. watched Shark Attack on Star Movies. and yea. haha. anyways. i recieved this really weird e-mail on a company's policies. lets hope that it doesnt really happen anywhere. [phew] you'll know when u finish reading it haha. here it goes. and oh. i'll wana wish WEN LI a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! i think i'll start wishing people i know a happy b'day on their special day. cuz i think its sweet haha. here goes!!!:
Dear Employees: Effective September 2006Dress Code
1. It is advised that you come to work dressed
according to your salary. If we see you wearing
Prada shoes and carrying a
Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a pay raise.
2. If you dress poorly, you need to
learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a pay raise.
3. If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a pay raise.
plain weird. HELLO eveything results in a NO PAY INCREASE you know haha.Sick Days
We will
no longer accept a doctor's certificate as proof of sickness.
If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
this one made me laugh a little. hahaha.Holiday DaysEach employee will receive
104 personal days a year. They are called
Saturday & Sunday.
104 personal days. SO MUCH for personal. SATURDAYS AND SUNDAYS! wow. haha.Compassionate LeaveThis is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements.
In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary,
the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to
work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
this was just plain NON-LAUGHTER except the funeral part. haha. NO LUNCH?! crazy?!Toilet Use 1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the cubicles.
2. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle door will open, and your picture will be taken.
3. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company notice board under the "Chronic Offenders" category.
4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sanctioned under the company's mental health policy. what the FUC* hahaha. this is the stupidest OKAY. hahaha. anyways. weirdest thing ever.
Lunch Break 1.
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more so that they can look healthy.
2.
Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
3.
Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are an employer of choice and we are here to provide a
positive employment experience.
Therefore, all
questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere. Bird Management
BIRD MANAGEMENT?! what a stupid name firstly, and secondly, this is totally ridiculous. haha. toilet breaks. strictly 3 minutes? crazy or what hahaha. anyway a little lameness there and entertainment. anyhows. i guess i'll end here. haha. till then,much love
every life is a new experience
